Deb Dana draws from Polyvagal Theory in observing that compassion emerges from a ventral vagal state in which we are open and grounded, and which enables our capacity for social interaction and connection.
It can be difficult when living with complex trauma to know what you need or to be kind to yourself. Developing self-compassion in small moments can open the door to being better able to reach out to others.
Kristen Neff (2017) speaks about the core elements of compassion as Self Kindness, Common Humanity and Mindfulness read more in our post below.
![Self-compassion allows us to engage difficult thoughts, feelings, and sensations with open eyes and an open heart at a pace we can manage.](https://blueknot.org.au/wp-content/uploads/2022/10/1.png)
![Self Kindness Watching the language we use towards ourselves when things are feeling heavy or overwhelming or we did not get the outcome we wanted.](https://blueknot.org.au/wp-content/uploads/2022/10/2.png)
![Common Humanity Acknowledging that others also experience these feelings and we are not alone. Its ok to reach out for support.](https://blueknot.org.au/wp-content/uploads/2022/10/3.png)
![Mindfulness Understanding and learning to move through feelings rather than avoiding or not voicing them. Acknowledging and noticing our responses and what they may be attached to but then letting them go.](https://blueknot.org.au/wp-content/uploads/2022/10/4.png)