Trauma can have lasting effects on the body and mind. If you live with dissociation or a Dissociative Disorder including Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), your experiences are understandable responses to overwhelming trauma. It is well recognised that DID develops when people experience severe early trauma and disrupted safety and care (complex trauma).
Research consistently shows that dissociation is not caused by imagination, fantasy, or suggestion. Healing and recovery from trauma-related dissociation takes time and progress often happens slowly and in small, meaningful steps. While therapy or counselling is useful for many there are many other elements which also contribute to healing.
Safety comes first
Feeling safe, both during dissociation and afterwards is foundational for healing.
Many people find it helpful to:
- Learn their early warning signs of distress or dissociation
- Have grounding strategies ready to help them return to the present
- Develop strategies that support their safety when they are feeling distressed
- Develop gentle routines that support them to rest adequately, nourish themselves and live lives which are as predictable as possible.
Going slowly is a sign of safe, paced trauma-informed care.
Understanding your triggers
Triggers are different for everyone, but dissociation is often triggered by:
- Reminders of past trauma (including sensory cues or intrusive memories)
- Closeness, intimacy, or fear of abandonment or loss
- Emotional or sensory overload
- Uncertainty, needing to make decisions or feeling scrutinised
- Shame or vulnerability.
Knowing your own triggers can help you respond earlier to them and more gently.
Learning skills to support you when you are distressed
Dissociation can involve sudden shifts in emotion or arousal e.g. feeling numb, agitated or overwhelmed. Many people find it helpful to build skills including:
- Adopting grounding and calming techniques
- Recognising emotions safely
- Acquiring strategies to soothe your nervous system
- Improving communication and cooperation between parts (if you have parts).
As you build these skills, you may find that dissociation becomes less intense and less disruptive in your life.
Grounding in the moment
Grounding helps your body and mind register that the danger has passed and you are safe right now.
To help you ground you might try one or a number of these strategies:
- Noticing sounds, colours, or objects around you
- Holding something cold in your hand or splashing cool water on your face
- Touching something with a familiar or distinct texture
- Tasting something with a strong flavour or a familiar taste
- Slow, steady breathing
- Gentle movement such as stretching or walking.
You don’t need to use every strategy. Choose what feels safe and works for you.
Relationships and trust
Because complex trauma often involves harm in relationships, it’s common to:
- Find it difficult to trust
- Feel overwhelmed by closeness or intimacy
- Feel unsure about depending on others.
Getting support from a therapist can provide skilled professional guidance. A trauma-informed therapist will move at your pace, respect your boundaries, and work alongside you in ways which feel safe and manageable. It may take you time to trust, and that is to be expected. Be patient with yourself; you deserve compassion, care and respect.
Identity, self-esteem, and parts of self
Dissociation and DID can affect how you see yourself. Therapy can help you:
- Strengthen your sense of self
- Reduce the shame you feel and any self-criticism
- Build self-compassion
- Increase understanding and cooperation between your parts (if you have parts).
- Healing does not mean getting rid of parts. For many people, it means feeling safer, more connected, and more in control.
Working with traumatic memories but only when you are ready
It is not generally advisable to explore trauma memories until later in therapy, once you feel safer and are better able to manage your emotions.
Moving too quickly can make you more distressed, dissociate more readily or have the urge to self-harm. Trauma- and dissociation-informed care means memory work only begins when you have the skills, support, and safety to manage it.
Supporting yourself day-to-day
Not everyone seeks professional support, and many people use gentle strategies alongside or instead of therapy.
Keeping a journal
Journaling can help you notice patterns, express feelings, track triggers, and record what helps. Some people also record useful grounding strategies or their safety plan in their journey.
Practical supports
Simple tools can reduce stress, such as:
- Wearing a watch with the time and date
- Writing down details of important contacts
- Leaving reminders for yourself around the house
- Keeping to routines where you can.
Connecting with others
Peer support can take a number of forms. Initially you might join a network to listen and hear or instead read other lived-experience stories. Connecting with others who have had similar experiences can help reduce your sense of isolation and shame.
Personal safety or crisis planning
A safety plan might include:
- Early warning signs
- Grounding strategies
- Trusted contacts
- What feels helpful (and unhelpful) when you’re distressed.
Looking after your wellbeing
Sleep, good nutrition, healthy hydration, and gentle movement all support you to regulate your nervous system. Many people notice dissociation increases when they are over-tired or under a lot of stress over time.
Navigating stigma
Dissociation and Dissociative Disorders including DID are often misunderstood. You may choose to educate other people as best you can or rather stay in contact with those who understand. You deserve care that is safe, respectful, and paced to your needs.
Staying safe
If you feel you are at risk of harming yourself or are feeling suicidal, please seek immediate support from a trusted person, your therapist, or a crisis support service. Your safety is a priority and you do not have to manage these feelings alone.
If you are in crisis, need immediate support or are concerned for your safety, please call Lifeline on 13 11 14.
Call 000 if your life is in danger.
